Game over (Week 4)

"A strange game. The only winning move is NOT to play. How about a nice game of chess?"

When the WOPR computer spoke to Matthew Broderick's character in War Games, the "game" it was referring to was global thermonuclear war. Agreed, that game is unwinnable. But chess, hey, any fool can learn that one, right? It's what I've tricked myself into believing over the years, to the point of obsession. I play chess on my iPhone. I play chess on my desktop. I play chess when the last thing I should be doing is playing chess, against strangers from all over the world. When I lose a game, I immediately fire off a challenge to the next player, and on it goes.

Now, this is from an admitted non-gamer. I tell myself that I'm not that guy in his basement with a PlayStation controller in his hand, sinking deeper and deeper into an overstuffed sofa. Then there's my other gaming diversion, a website called Sporcle, which bills itself as the world's largest trivia quiz website. I've spent way too many hours testing my knowledge of American states and World War II history. I tell myself it's "enriching," but who's kidding who, it's just another gaming addiction.

Going cold turkey on gaming for a week would be hard even for a non-gamer, as it turned out. How about a nice game of chess? No chance. As WOPR says, the only winning move is not to play.

First, I needed to confirm for myself that I was hooked on gaming. I popped into an addiction centre resource site, and checked out some signs and symptoms. Fatigue? Yup. Headaches from intense concentration? Sure. I didn't need to read any more. I was convinced it was enough to make a 7-day resolution.

Of course, the most likely outcome of giving up one obsessive behaviour is that you simply replace it with another. Guilty! At times when I might reach for my iPhone, I grabbed the remote instead and began binge-watching Netflix with Val. Still, I remained true to my plan, and did find that my productivity improved for the week. For one thing, I had more time to write a blog. I also became more social, going out with friends almost every night.

Can we talk about low points? That would be me in an AirBnB suite in Calgary, all alone after Val had checked out and flown back to Victoria. I had watched and read all the things I wanted, and was just jonesing for that quick endorphin rush of thrashing some chess inferior from Kazakhstan (who are quite a bit cleverer than Borat, as it turns out). I told myself "just one quick one" in much the same way a junkie convinces himself that one hit won't make a difference. I thought "who's gonna know anyway?"

That's when a voice played in my mind, and it was Val asking me what the penalty was for not meeting a resolution. Penalty? No penalty, I said. Just knowing you had not fulfilled your goal was all the penalty you needed. And I rolled that thought around in my noodle, knowing that I would be very displeased with myself if I gave in to temptation. Get behind me, Satan!

And so, I beat back the gaming devil, and the victory was as satisfying as any checkmate I can remember.

NEXT WEEK: No booze!